Alice and Myrtle were old friends. One slow summer afternoon as they sipped iced tea, Alice asked, “Myrtle, did you and your husband ever have mutual orgasm?”

Myrtle sipped and rocked and rocked and sipped. “No,” she finally replied. “We always had State Farm.”

Boudreau asks Bubba if he wants to go to the beach. Bubba says, “Oh, I’m embarrassed to go to the beach. I don’t fill out a swimsuit none too good.”

Boudreau says, “Bubba, just stick a nice sized tater down the front of your swim suit. It’ll do jist fine.”

So they head off to the beach. Boudreau sits down to read and Bubba goes for a walk. Boudreau comes back an hour later and he says, “Bubba, I don’t think that there tater was such a good idea. Ever’bodys pointin’ and laughin’.”

Boudreau tells him, “Bubba, you idjit, I tolt ya to put that there tater down the FRONT o’ yer suit!”

1st College Student: Did you hear that Fred’s parents sent him abroad for the summer?

2nd College Student: My parents won’t even allow playboy centerfolds on the wall..