“And exactly what made you suspect that these two men were drunk, officer?” a Glasgow judge asked a policeman in court.
“Well, Your Honor,” said the policeman, “Jock was throwing five pound notes away and Hamish was picking them up and handing them back to him.”
“Well, Your Honor,” said the policeman, “Jock was throwing five pound notes away and Hamish was picking them up and handing them back to him.”
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think that people are laughing WITH you.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to wake up in the morning wondering what happened to your clothes.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major cause of dancing like an idiot.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think that you are a good singer.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
A beer in the hand is worth two in the fridge.
Drunk 1: Do lemons have wings?
Drunk 2: What?
Drunk 1: I said, do lemons have wings?
Drunk 2: Of course not. Drunk 1: Oh no, I think I just squeezed a canary into my drink!
Drunk 2: What?
Drunk 1: I said, do lemons have wings?
Drunk 2: Of course not. Drunk 1: Oh no, I think I just squeezed a canary into my drink!
I’m not as think as you stoned I am
A man was staggering home drunk in the early hours of the morning when he was stopped by a police officer. ‘What are you doing out at this time of night?’ asked the officer. ‘I’m going to a lecture,’ slurred the drunk. ‘And who’s going to give a lecture at this hour?’ ‘My wife.’
Nutsrok 
I can’t understand these people, but they are acting silly. :-D :-D :-D
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Probably good you don’t, Tess.
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Ha ha ha
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