The grim reaper came for me on Friday March 25, 2016. I bought the farm. I bit the dust. So I guess I’m off to the promised land eh? The promised land! Imagine!
Anyway, I was born at St. Joseph’s Hospital in Glace Bay on Nov. 26, 1948. Of 13 children in the family, I was the sixth born.
I was predeceased by four brothers, Lawrence 1943, Pat 1990, Kevin 1999, Allen 2010.
I am survived by my OG Brenda, Tower Road; my three children, Tyler, Stratford, Ont., Lawrence and his wife, Lisa, St. Mary’s, Ont. and Coady, Tower Road and my grandchildren, Nicole MacDonald, Glace Bay, Charlise MacDonald, Stratford, Ont., Hayden and Nathan MacDonald, St. Mary’s, Ont. and Haille and Lukas MacLeod, St. Mary’s, Ont.
So anyway, I think I was a pretty nice guy, despite being a former punk and despite what some people would say about me. What did they know about me anyway? I loved my family and cared for them through good times and bad; I did my best.
I had some serious health problems the last few years, but survived them (up till now anyway) with the help of my wife, Brenda; my granddaughter, Nicole; my sweetheart little dog, Scarlett, and my rescue kitten, Dolly.
Elaine and Sonya and all the other nurses from the VON and the doctors and nurses at the Cape Breton Cancer Centre, the Palliative Care nurses and doctors, Dr. Archibald and doctors and nurses at Glace Bay hospital.
My little dog Scarlett died Sept. 2013, and there really are no words to describe what a total destresser Scarlett was for me. So I guess if there’s a place in the after-life where little dogs and old dawgs go, then that’s where you’ll find me and Scarlett. Maybe I’ll see you all there sometime.
Besides my wife, children and grandchildren, the single most wonderful event in my life was spending three years at UCCB, now CBU where I earned my BACS Degree, 1992 grad.
I don’t want a funeral. A funeral is a waste of harrrrrrd earned and harrrrrrd saved money that my family can use now.
I was a very private person in life, so I don’t want to end that life with people gawking at me while I lay in a coffin.
I’m being cremated and my ashes are being scattered (somewhere). So instead of going to see the great creator, I will be going to see the great cremater.
Memorial donations may be made to the Palliative Care Unit at the Cape Breton Regional Hospital
For those who would like to express condolences, visitation will take place on Thursday, March 31, 2016 from 1-3 p.m. in Patten Funeral Home, 71 Union St., Glace Bay, with memorial service to follow at 3 p.m.
I am reblogging an old post from 2015 when I used to do an advice column. I enjoyed it very much. Please address any questions or concerns you’d like addressed in comments or to my email Lbeth1950@hotmail.com Thanks
Dear Auntie Linda, My mother is seventy-four and moved in with me and my husband four years ago. She is in good health, still drives, and is active…
I suppose I excel in cooking. I love anything that has to do with cooking. I can make a delicious meal without much thought. After fifty-four years of marriage, I have experience on my side. Now things just seem to fall together. I love entertaining family and friends. An invitation always includes reminder to bring a container if you want to take food home. We rarely eat out because home-cooked meals are so much better. The only exception is seafood. I prefer to eat out for seafood. If you are coming for a meal at my house, be sure to bring a container for take home.
Danny Lloyd, aka Rooster, aka Winston, aka Pizza Pop, passed away on April 25th at the age of 64, “to avoid having to pay taxes for the past year and to avoid another year of his New York Yankees not winning the World Series.”
A celebration of life will be held at 5:00 pm on Sunday, May 20, 2018 at Davidson Funeral Home in Lexington. The family will receive friends following the service.
Danny is survived by his sons, Frank Callicutt (Beth) and Chris Lloyd; daughters, Abbie Callicutt and Heather Lloyd, all of Lexington and five grandchildren; Mary Lloyd, Annabell and Abbie Callicutt, and Liam and Charlie Blackerby. He is also survived by three siblings; James Lloyd (Tanya), David Lloyd and Suzie Lloyd. He was preceded in death by his parents, Charles and Barbara Kimball Lloyd.
He was a generous man – giving away many of his possessions in the months before he died. He even left his car to twelve different friends, depending upon who visited him last. He was a life-long ticket scalper and broker, or as he called it “a facilitator of supply/demand economics.” Once when asked about any regrets from his ticket sales, Danny confessed, “There was that time I told a Carolina fan that he needed to buy my ticket immediately if he wanted to hear Dean Smith sing the National Anthem.”
Danny was cremated – for two reasons: There could be no viewing since his family refused to honor his request to have him standing in the corner of the room with a sign saying “Buying Tickets” in one hand, and in his other hand a sign saying “Selling Tickets” so that he would appear natural and life-like to his visitors.
Because his brother played football for Wake Forest University, Danny was a lifelong Demon Deacon fan, and he had respectfully requested six Wake Forest pall bearers so that the “Deacs” could “let him down” one last time.
Danny has informed Hampton Inn that they can finally reinstate their pledge to not charge anyone who is not 100% satisfied, as he will no longer be staying there.
For those attending his memorial service, please ignore Danny’s scalper friends who might be offering to upgrade your seat for a small price. To any crooks reading this: None of the family and friends attending this service have anything of value. Remember, he gave his car to a dozen of us. And one of his sons is Chris “Country” Lloyd, so it is certainly not worth the risk.
Danny Lloyd loved his siblings a little bit, and his children even more. But those grandkids…they stole his heart. They were the reason he lived his final 4 years with a sober mind and a giving heart.
Q: Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
A: She was no spring chicken.
NUMBER TWO:
A librarian was very sad and alone in the library one day as there was no one around for her to help. These two chickens came through the door screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian quickly got up and gave them each 5 books. The two chickens left satisfied. Just a few minutes later the same two chickens come through the door with no books screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian once again jumped up and gave each chicken 15 books this time. The chickens leave satisfied once again. Then for the third time the chickens returned screeching “bouk bouk”, but this time being suspicious the librarian gave each chicken only one book and explained that they could only borrow more books once that had returned the others. As the chickens left the librarian slowly followed behind to see where all the chickens and the books were going. The chickens came to a stop by a pond and started throwing the books into the water. Appalled the librarian ran forward to tell them to stop but she suddenly noticed there were some frogs in the pond grabbing the books and throwing them back croaking behind “red-it… red-it”.
NUMBER THREE:
Q: Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
A: Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan!
NUMBER FOUR:
A man was driving along a freeway when he noticed a chicken running alongside his car. He was amazed to see the chicken keeping up with him, as he was doing 50 mph. He accelerated to 60, and the chicken stayed right next to him. He sped up to 75 mph, and the chicken passed him. The man noticed that the chicken had three legs. So, he followed the chicken down a road and ended up at a farm. He got out of his car and saw that all the chickens had three legs.
He asked the farmer, “what’s up with these chickens?”
The farmer said, “Well, everybody likes chicken legs, so I bred a three-legged bird. I’m going to be a millionaire.”
The man asked him how they tasted. The farmer said, “don’t know, haven’t caught one yet.”
NUMBER FIVE:
Psychiatrist: What seems to be the problem?
Patient: I think I’m a chicken.
Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?
Patient: Ever since I came out of my shell.
NUMBER SIX:
Q: What do you call a scary chicken?
A: A poultrygeist.
NUMBER SEVEN:
A man runs to the psychiatrist and says, “Doctor, you’ve got to help me. My wife thinks she’s a chicken!”
The psychiatrist asks, “How long has she had this condition?”
“Two years,” says the man.
“Then why did it take you so long to come and see me?” asked the psychiatrist.
The man shrugs his shoulders and replies, “We needed the eggs.”
NUMBER EIGHT:
NUMBER ONE:
Q: Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
A: She was no spring chicken.
NUMBER TWO:
A librarian was very sad and alone in the library one day as there was no one around for her to help. These two chickens came through the door screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian quickly got up and gave them each 5 books. The two chickens left satisfied. Just a few minutes later the same two chickens come through the door with no books screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian once again jumped up and gave each chicken 15 books this time. The chickens leave satisfied once again. Then for the third time the chickens returned screeching “bouk bouk”, but this time being suspicious the librarian gave each chicken only one book and explained that they could only borrow more books once that had returned the others. As the chickens left the librarian slowly followed behind to see where all the chickens and the books were going. The chickens came to a stop by a pond and started throwing the books into the water. Appalled the librarian ran forward to tell them to stop but she suddenly noticed there were some frogs in the pond grabbing the books and throwing them back croaking behind “red-it… red-it”.
A: Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan!
NUMBER FOUR:
A man was driving along a freeway when he noticed a chicken running alongside his car. He was amazed to see the chicken keeping up with him, as he was doing 50 mph. He accelerated to 60, and the chicken stayed right next to him. He sped up to 75 mph, and the chicken passed him. The man noticed that the chicken had three legs. So, he followed the chicken down a road and ended up at a farm. He got out of his car and saw that all the chickens had three legs.
A man runs to the psychiatrist and says, “Doctor, you’ve got to help me. My wife thinks she’s a chicken!”
The psychiatrist asks, “How long has she had this condition?”
“Two years,” says the man.
“Then why did it take you so long to come and see me?” asked the psychiatrist.
The man shrugs his shoulders and replies, “We needed the eggs.”
NUMBER EIGHT:
NUMBER ONE:
Q: Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
A: She was no spring chicken.
NUMBER TWO:
A librarian was very sad and alone in the library one day as there was no one around for her to help. These two chickens came through the door screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian quickly got up and gave them each 5 books. The two chickens left satisfied. Just a few minutes later the same two chickens come through the door with no books screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian once again jumped up and gave each chicken 15 books this time. The chickens leave satisfied once again. Then for the third time the chickens returned screeching “bouk bouk”, but this time being suspicious the librarian gave each chicken only one book and explained that they could only borrow more books once that had returned the others. As the chickens left the librarian slowly followed behind to see where all the chickens and the books were going. The chickens came to a stop by a pond and started throwing the books into the water. Appalled the librarian ran forward to tell them to stop but she suddenly noticed there were some frogs in the pond grabbing the books and throwing them back croaking behind “red-it… red-it”.
A: Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan!
NUMBER FOUR:
A man was driving along a freeway when he noticed a chicken running alongside his car. He was amazed to see the chicken keeping up with him, as he was doing 50 mph. He accelerated to 60, and the chicken stayed right next to him. He sped up to 75 mph, and the chicken passed him. The man noticed that the chicken had three legs. So, he followed the chicken down a road and ended up at a farm. He got out of his car and saw that all the chickens had three legs.
A man runs to the psychiatrist and says, “Doctor, you’ve got to help me. My wife thinks she’s a chicken!”
The psychiatrist asks, “How long has she had this condition?”
“Two years,” says the man.
“Then why did it take you so long to come and see me?” asked the psychiatrist.
The man shrugs his shoulders and replies, “We needed the eggs.”
NUMBER EIGHT:
NUMBER ONE:
Q: Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
A: She was no spring chicken.
NUMBER TWO:
A librarian was very sad and alone in the library one day as there was no one around for her to help. These two chickens came through the door screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian quickly got up and gave them each 5 books. The two chickens left satisfied. Just a few minutes later the same two chickens come through the door with no books screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian once again jumped up and gave each chicken 15 books this time. The chickens leave satisfied once again. Then for the third time the chickens returned screeching “bouk bouk”, but this time being suspicious the librarian gave each chicken only one book and explained that they could only borrow more books once that had returned the others. As the chickens left the librarian slowly followed behind to see where all the chickens and the books were going. The chickens came to a stop by a pond and started throwing the books into the water. Appalled the librarian ran forward to tell them to stop but she suddenly noticed there were some frogs in the pond grabbing the books and throwing them back croaking behind “red-it… red-it”.
A: Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan!
NUMBER FOUR:
A man was driving along a freeway when he noticed a chicken running alongside his car. He was amazed to see the chicken keeping up with him, as he was doing 50 mph. He accelerated to 60, and the chicken stayed right next to him. He sped up to 75 mph, and the chicken passed him. The man noticed that the chicken had three legs. So, he followed the chicken down a road and ended up at a farm. He got out of his car and saw that all the chickens had three legs.
A man runs to the psychiatrist and says, “Doctor, you’ve got to help me. My wife thinks she’s a chicken!”
The psychiatrist asks, “How long has she had this condition?”
“Two years,” says the man.
“Then why did it take you so long to come and see me?” asked the psychiatrist.
The man shrugs his shoulders and replies, “We needed the eggs.”
NUMBER EIGHT:
NUMBER ONE:
Q: Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
A: She was no spring chicken.
NUMBER TWO:
A librarian was very sad and alone in the library one day as there was no one around for her to help. These two chickens came through the door screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian quickly got up and gave them each 5 books. The two chickens left satisfied. Just a few minutes later the same two chickens come through the door with no books screeching “bouk bouk.” The librarian once again jumped up and gave each chicken 15 books this time. The chickens leave satisfied once again. Then for the third time the chickens returned screeching “bouk bouk”, but this time being suspicious the librarian gave each chicken only one book and explained that they could only borrow more books once that had returned the others. As the chickens left the librarian slowly followed behind to see where all the chickens and the books were going. The chickens came to a stop by a pond and started throwing the books into the water. Appalled the librarian ran forward to tell them to stop but she suddenly noticed there were some frogs in the pond grabbing the books and throwing them back croaking behind “red-it… red-it”.
A: Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan!
NUMBER FOUR:
A man was driving along a freeway when he noticed a chicken running alongside his car. He was amazed to see the chicken keeping up with him, as he was doing 50 mph. He accelerated to 60, and the chicken stayed right next to him. He sped up to 75 mph, and the chicken passed him. The man noticed that the chicken had three legs. So, he followed the chicken down a road and ended up at a farm. He got out of his car and saw that all the chickens had three legs.
We went places and saw people that normal people never encountered. I think he just need a “trash fix” from time to time. He’d heard of somebody who lived back in the woods about four miles off Tobacco Road who had something he might be interested in buying. He had to check it out, driving forever down muddy roads that looked like they might peter off into nothing. Finally we got back to Mr. Tucker’s shack. The old man was wearing unbuttoned overalls and nothing else. While Daddy and Mr. Tucker disappeared into the tangle of weeds and mess of old cars, car tires, trash, dead washing machines and other refuse behind the house, Mother and the kids sat in the car. It was hot. Daddy was gone. It got hotter. Daddy was still gone. We opened the car doors, hoping to catch a breeze. It got hotter and hotter. The baby was squalling. Mrs. Tucker, a big woman in overalls came out in the front yard and started a fire, never even looking our way, probably thinking our car was just another junk car in the yard. As the sun blazed overhead, we begged Mother to ask Mrs. Tucker for a drink of water. Somewhere in the wilderness, Daddy was still admiring Mr. Tucker’s junk collection. He could talk for hours, unconcerned that his family was waiting in misery. It didn’t matter that he didn’t know the people he had imposed himself on. We spent many a miserable hour waiting in the car while he “talked,” usually on the way to visit some of his relatives.
Finally, in desperation, Mother got out of the car, introduced herself to Mrs. Tucker, and asked if we could have a drink of water. Turning without speaking, she disappeared into the house, returning with some cloudy snuff glasses. Calling us over to the well, she drew a bucket of water, and let us drink till we were satisfied. That was the best water I ever had. Mrs. Tucker pulled a couple of chairs under a shade tree and Mother sat down. We all sat down in the dirt in the cool of the shade and played. Daddy was still gone but things looked a lot better after we cooled off and had a drink. Mrs. Tucker was interesting to look at, but didn’t have a lot to say. She had a couple of teeth missing, greasy red hair in a bowl cut, and long scratches down both arms.
Mother tried to converse, but Mrs. Tucker didn’t have a lot to say. I couldn’t take my eyes off the missing teeth and long scratches down her arm. I started talking to her. She didn’t have any kids. It didn’t take long to figure out she “wasn’t right.” I was fascinated and wanted to ask about what happened to the teeth, but knew what that would get me, so I asked instead about her scratched arms. Mother hushed me up but that topic inspired Mrs. Tucker. It seem, she was going to put a rooster in the big pot in the front yard to scald before plucking. He scratched her and escaped before she could get the lid on. Apparently she didn’t know she was supposed to kill him first. Just at the point where things were getting interesting, Daddy came back and I didn’t get to hear the rest of the story.
Mrs. Tucker sent us home with a turkey that day, teaching me a valuable lesson. Don’t ever accept the gift of a turkey. Ol’ Tom was to be the guest of honor at our Thanksgiving Dinner. Daddy put him in the chicken yard and Tom took over, whipping the roosters, terrorizing the hens, and jumping on any kid sent to feed poultry. We hated him. Mother brandished a stick to threaten him when she had to visit to the chicken yard. He even flew over the fence and chased us as we played in the back yard till Daddy clipped his wings.
Before too long, we saw the Nickerson kids, the meanest kids in the neighborhood, headed for the chicken yard. Mother couldn’t wait to see Tom get them. Sure enough, Ol’ Devil Tom jumped out from behind a shed on jumped on the biggest boy, Clarence. Clarence yelped and ran at Ol’ Tom, his mean brothers close on his heels, flogging Ol’ Tom mercilessly. Unlike us, they didn’t run out with their tails tucked between their legs. They launched an all-out attack on Tom, beating him with their jackets, sticks, and whatever they could grab. They chased him till they tired of the game. Tom never chased any of us again, but Mother never got around to thanking the Nickersons.
Nutsrok 