Growing Up in a Communal Home: Memories from Houston

Before I started school, my grandparents lived communally on the ground floor of a formerly grand old house in Houston. Clearly the growing city was encroaching on the fading beauty.Cookie, Uncle Riley, and Cousin Barbie lived there too. It was on a busy street with nonstop traffic. The noise of constant traffic and honking horns intruded constantly. The air was never free of exhaust. A large grocery store stood catty-cornered from them and a funeral home directly across. An eight-foot wide sidewalk ran from the front steps to the sidewalk fronting the street. A stately porch ran around three sides of the house. Most intriguing of all, what appeared to be a closet enclosed four steps of a staircase ascending to nowhere. An old lady rented the second-floor apartment complete with an identical porch.

I desperately wanted to explore the second floor but Grandma shut me down. “We can’t go up there. Another family lives there.” Everyone I knew lived in a regular house. I’d never seen an apartment or house divided into apartments.

Grandma was overprotective. I was old enough to be trusted not to wander out in the street but she was convinced a passerby would snatch me off the sidewalk. Also, she was worried a speeding car would plow up onto the sidewalk. She stood guard nearby scowling with her trusty broom just in case a foolhardy kidnapper looked tempted. We were free to play on the enormous wrap around porch.

Cousin Barbie didn’t have to share. She screamed if we approached her inflatable wading pool set up in the porch. She kept her skates close by, intending to keep them safe from me and my brother. That was managed easily enough. While one of us skated, the other ran in and out of the pool. We kept her running and screaming till Cookie took her in for fear of an asthma attack. That worked for us.

One morning as Grandma worked in her flower beds, I was allowed to play on the sidewalk a few feet away. To my great surprise, the lady living on the second floor dashed her bucket of mop water onto my head. I thought it a delightful surprise for a hot day! Grandma was enraged. She tore into her upstairs neighbor while Mother whisked me in to wash off the mop water.

To be continued

Best advice

What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?

The best advice I ever heard was from a guy Bud knew who worked in the oilfield.

“Only fools f…..ks with snakes!”

Can’t argue with that!

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The Children’s Guide to Funerals: Lessons from Mr. Bradley

I am reposting an old post from September 23, 2014

Mr. Bradley died!! Mr. Bradley died!!

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This was unbelievable! I had seen people get shot on “Gunsmoke,” but I’d never known anyone who had actually died. I knew I was supposed to cry when someone died but I couldn’t manage it. First of all, Mr. Bradley was an old grouch. He wore khaki pants and shirt and an old gray felt hat with oil stains around the hat band. He was really selfish. Continue reading

Doorbell Ring

https://ring.com/share/7f5d90a7-df84-4ccf-8383-61c2cd04744c

Our doorbell kept ring all afternoon. Follow the link to see our guest!

Sunshine

What things give you energy?

Sunshine gives me energy. There’s no better way to wake up than to birdsong and sunshine. It just gives me a feeling of optimism and timelessness, reminding me that I am just a part of something bigger. I am not responsible for everything, just my little corner of the world. I love that universal feeling.

Lessons from Childhood: The Connie and Marilyn Story

My sister Connie is seventeen months older than Marilyn.  She was protective of Marilyn from the start, always giving over to “the baby,”. She wasn’t encouraged to do it, that’s just how she was.  Mother was careful not make a difference or favor Marilyn.  In fact, she was felt bad at seeing Connie knocked out of the baby spot, so bent over backwards trying to be fair.

Marilyn had no problem asserting herself. Since Connie didn’t want Marilyn to get in trouble, she rarely hit Marilyn back or tattled on her.  I infer this worked well for Marilyn..  As country children often do, one day Connie didn’t want to take time to go in and wee wee.  She simply darted behind a tree to do the job.  Finding an abandoned hubcap that served as a dog-feeding dish, she squatted and filled it.  As she stood, Marilyn slipped up behind her and kicked it, splashing Connie liberally.  Instead of smacking Marilyn like a normal kid would have, Connie just exclaimed, “Damn!”  Marilyn was off like a shot, looking for Mother,  Connie ,right behind her as soon as she got her wet clothes pulled up.

””Mama, Mama!  Connie said “Damn!”  This was big trouble.  Mother wouldn’t tolerate trashytalk.

Mother whirled around, shocked, expecting Connie to deny the evil deed.  “Connie, did you say, “Damn?”

”Yes ma’am.” Connie whimpered.  Had she told Mother what Marilyn had done, they would both have been swatted.

”Get me the fly swat.”  Mother kept a plastic fly swat hanging by the back door ready for just such a occasion.  She gave Connie two or three quick swats and dismissed her, while Marilyn stood by self-righteously.  It was years before Connie told the whole story.

I wonder if the dogs thought “Damn” later that day when they smelled pee in their dish.

My family:  I am in the back row Left, holding Connie’s hands,  Billy Center, Phyllis  holding Marilyn Right.

Lessons from a 96-Year-Old Mother

My mother has reached the age where she has few peers. At ninety-six she is is a generation ahead of most baby-boomers. Several times when we’ve been out to eat, a gray-haired man has stopped by the table and asked to pay for her meal. They usually say they miss their mother.

people of all ages go out of their way to help Mother. Shoppers in the grocery store offer to get things off shelves. Neighbors offer to take out her trash or help in other ways.

Two little boys had stopped to visit Mother, then lingered to visit. She heard them talking outside her back door.

”Miz Swain’s old.” One remarked.

”Yeah, but she’s a nice lady.” the other replied.

”But she’s old. She’s just full of …..”He cast around for the right word.

”Oldness.” replied his friend. “She’s full of oldness.”

Favorite Album

What’s your all-time favorite album?

My favorite is by Harry Belafonte. I am posting the cover below. It has “Lemon Tree”, “Day-o”. “Darling Cora”, and numerous other wonderful songs on it.

Aging gracefully, or Not

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'Push'n 50, but ya still got it!!'

‘Push’n 50, but ya still got it!!’

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When I was a kid, there were a lot of things I wanted to ask old people, but didn’t have the nerve. I’ll post some of them, since I have some “old friends” who have answered some of them for me. If you have questions, send them in and I’ll try to get some answers for you, too.

1. Do old people still have sex? Sure, thanks to pharmacology, if they can find someone willing, able, and blind or demented enough.

2. Why do old people drive so slow and park crazy? Most of them are retired and it doesn’t matter how long it takes them to park. Just be glad they didn’t scrape your fender on the way in to that space. They may have neck and back pain and stiff joints.

3. Why do old people dress so crazy? Why do kids dress crazy? They want to.

4. Why do old men grow hair on their noses and ears and old women get whiskers? All the energy that used to go into head hair and perky breasts gets rerouted when hormones play out. God forbid science extends life expectancy too much. We’ll all look like androgynous Brillo pads and be deaf as a stone.

5. Why do old people have such big noses and ears? Some body parts never stop growing. Unfortunately, this is usually limited to noses and ears, not something more appreciable. This big-eared looked is greatly enhanced by baldness and frizzy hair. The nose gets bigger to hold glasses up.

If you have questions, address them in comments. I’ll address them for you.