Yesterday afternoon about three-thirty, I was preparing to put a chicken in the oven to roast for a sensible dinner. Over the course of the next ten minutes, the electricity flashed off, then on again two or three times. Normally when this happens, it goes off for good. I decided on my back up plan for the chicken. Though I have a gas stove. The oven won’t work when the power goes off, so I lit the burner with a match and fried the chicken, a less healthy and much welcomed choice. When I served dinner, still with no power, Bud passed on the healthy side salad, and probably had the best dinner he’d had In a while, fried chicken and butternut squash pie, all the good stuff and not too much pesky nutrition. He was a happy man.
memoir
Bodies Beautiful
Reblogged from Cordelia’s Mom, Still.
I’m happy to say that I didn’t cry after all.
As my mother wished, upon her death three years ago, we donated her body to the local medical school – State University of New York at Buffalo (UB). Every 18 months or so, UB holds a memorial service for the families of all those whose bodies have been used to train new medical students. Today was the service which included my mother.
You will recall from a recent post that notice of this service hit me hard, but I felt I owed it to Mom to honor her memory. Although I knew the service would be for more than just my own mother, I expected it to be a rather small ceremony attended by maybe 30 or 40 people.
Last night, we learned there would be around 500 people in attendance!, and I seriously debated the wisdom of attending what…
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Dear Auntie Linda
Dear Auntie Linda, I was out to dinner with a group of friends from work when John, an old boyfriend, spotted me and stopped by our table. We were a couple for a few months until I realized he was a narcissist and I realized I needed out. I don’t know why I ever went out with him to start with since he had three ex-wives and four children. We remained on vaguely friendly terms, so I wasn’t surprised he stopped off speak to me. me. Part of the reason we broke up was because I found out he cheated with old girlfriends the whole time I thought we were in a committed relationship. That, and the fact the he became more critical and more manipulative the whole time we were together. I am now happily married with a new baby., now, and want nothing to do with him. One of our group posted a picture with names of everyone in our party.
When I came back from three months maternity leave, Jody, one of my office mates was excited to tell me that John messaged her after seeing her on Facebook. John has moved in with her, and they plan to marry right away. She was over the moon with joy. “John treats me like a princess. John is crazy about my kids. We go out to dinner every night. He wants to get married right away and have a baby.” She is a friend as well as co worker. I feel awful for her. She is smitten. This is John’s pattern, as I sadly learned.
I was very non-commital, but am torn over what, if anything, I should say to her. I don’t want her to think I am still interested in John. On one hand, I like Jody and work in the office next to her. She knows John and I were a couple and has asked a few questions. I don’t want to go into our history, but feel sure she is headed for trouble. I dread having to see it firsthand, especially at work on a daily basis. Should I try to tip her off or just let the chips fall? Been There
Dear Been There, If Jody asks for advice, there’s no reason you shouldn’t give generic advice like, “I always encourage people to take the time to get to know their fiancé well before jumping in with both feet.” Chances are, she’s made up her mind. Auntie Linda
Dear Auntie Linda, my husband and I are retired. We both worked hard and split the chores while we worked. I did most of the housekeeping, cooking, and laundry. He did the mowing, car care, and bill-paying. Since we retired, I work outdoors a lot, because I enjoy it, still cook two meals a day, and do all the household chores. The problem is, I spend a lot more time working now that he does. He doesn’t want to pick up any household chores or pay for cleaning help, even though we can easily afford it. How do we settle this? Katie the Cleaning Lady
Dear Katie, Is your husband inclined to be fair in general? Sounds like he doesn’t want to give up a good deal. It depends on whether you are willing to do. If he is unwilling to do some swapping, let him eat whatever he wants to fix for dinner and leave his laundry. Cold cereal, peanut butter, baloney sandwiches and canned soup are way cheaper than big meals. You could save grocery money and pay cleaning help. If he is not interested in change, it’s up to you. Let some stuff go. Auntie Linda
Wonderful Times of Reading Aloud
It has always been a joy to hear my sister Phyllis read aloud. Till my last days, I will cherish a few days during school Christmas vacation in 1961. Phyllis was enjoying reading Great Expectations in her ninth grade English class and offered to read a few pages aloud. Daddy was working second shift at the paper mill, so once he left and the remains of the noon meal were cleared away, we settled in the cozy living room for a reading. I would have been eleven, Billy, eight, and Connie and Marilyn, two and a few months old. Enraptured by the story of Pip, the cruel Estella, and the mad Miss Havisham, I would have probably saved the book first had the house caught fire. I loved the kindly Jo and despised Mrs. Jo, his mean sister. Phyllis read for several hours as the babies played on the floor in the warm front room, enjoying being in the middle of us all clustered together around the reader. We broke only long enough to get a simple supper together and do evening chores. Soon we were back in place, where she held us till bedtime, happy captives.
The next day, we rushed through chores to be free for reading again, settling in as soon as Daddy left. Phyllis read on and on, as we did whatever chores we could that didn’t, interfere with her reading, folding laundry, ironing, watching the babies. Mother hemmed a skirt and hand-worked buttonholes in a blouse. Mother just felt we couldn’t through another afternoon listening to Phyllis read.
The next day, and the next, Phyllis read as we hung on every word about foolish, arrogant Pip. Finally, late on the fourth day, Phyllis finished Great Expectations,
leaving me questioning and hungering for more. Why had Miss Havisham gone to so much trouble to be cruel? How could Pip be so ungrateful and foolish? What happened afterwards?
Phyllis read us many more books, to my great joy, introducing me to some great literature.
FarSide
Corn and Bunion plants.
far-2: This “Far Side” strip was reprinted in the Green Sheet during Gary Larson’s hiatus from the strip on March 23, 1989.
Promote Yourself!
Reblogged. Promote yourself
Feisty Granny
‘You can always tell when Granny has had a good day playing bingo.’
An elderly lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her car. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at them at the top of her voice, “I have a gun and I know how to use it!
Get out of the car you scumbags!”
The four men didn’t wait for a second invitation but got out and ran like mad, whereupon the lady, somewhat shaken, proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver’s seat.
She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried and then it dawned on her why. A few minutes later she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags into her car and drove to the police station.
The sergeant to whom she told the story nearly tore himself in two with laughter and pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale white males were reporting a car jacking by a mad elderly woman described as white, less than 5′ tall, glasses, and curly white hair carrying a large handgun.
Fashion Parade
Not too long ago Bud and I spent some time waiting to get our taxes done. Anxious waiting is the best kind. Several other couples were sharing our misery. They were sitting far enough away that I couldn’t initiate a conversation like I often do, so I had to content myself with giving them a thorough inspection, since their conversation held little interest. I admired the woman’s sweater of cheery buttercup yellow, well-made, and obviously high quality. It fit her perfectly. She saw me admiring her and smiled. What a nice lady. I’d like to visit with her.
Whispering, I pointed her out to Bud, “I love that woman’s sweater.”
Bud gave a cursory look, then commented, “I like her husband’s shirt.”
I hadn’t even noticed. The man was wearing the same Walmart shirt Bud was sporting, both a little worse for the wear.
Aging gracefully, or Not
‘Push’n 50, but ya still got it!!’
When I was a kid, there were a lot of things I wanted to ask old people, but didn’t have the nerve. I’ll post some of them, since I have some “old friends” who have answered some of them for me. If you have questions, send them in and I’ll try to get some answers for you, too.
1. Do old people still have sex? Sure, thanks to pharmacology, if they can find someone willing, able, and blind or demented enough.
2. Why do old people drive so slow and park crazy? Most of them are retired and it doesn’t matter how long it takes them to park. Just be glad they didn’t scrape your fender on the way in to that space. They may have neck and back pain and stiff joints.
3. Why do old people dress so crazy? Why do kids dress crazy? They want to.
4. Why do old men grow hair on their noses and ears and old women get whiskers? All the energy that used to go into head hair and perky breasts gets rerouted when hormones play out. God forbid science extends life expectancy too much. We’ll all look like androgynous Brillo pads and be deaf as a stone.
5. Why do old people have such big noses and ears? Some body parts never stop growing. Unfortunately, this is usually limited to noses and ears, not something more appreciable. This big-eared looked is greatly enhanced by baldness and frizzy hair. The nose gets bigger to hold glasses up.
If you have questions, address them in comments. I’ll address them for you.
Nutsrok 