The family visited over lunch and Geneva left to rest, promising to bring the children home before dinner.  As she drove off, Miss Jessie was at the kitchen door with several large boxes.  “I’m early, but I thought I’d stop by and see if you wanted to try this dress now.  I do believe you’ll love what I brought.  You won’t see anything like this yellow silk anywhere.  I had Miss Viola put some custom touches on this beauty just for you.  Do you want to try it with these new foundation garments? I can come up and help if you’re ready.”

“Wth everything that’s going on, the fitting had slipped my mind, but let’s go ahead.” Ellen replied.  “My mother just left.  She and my girls have been with my cousin Jean all summer, and she was letting me know Cousin Jean died during the night.  She just got back in town.  They’ll be back before dinner, but we have plenty of time before then.”  She led Jessie up the stairs to her bedroom, though Jessie knew the way well.

Jessie unboxed the dress and stretched it across the bed to show it to best advantage while Ellen preened before the mirror, her back to Jessie. “I was reluctant to try this shorter style, but I think it’s quite daring, don’t you?”  Ellen asked.

“It’s charming.  I’d try it myself, but I couldn’t carry it off as well as you.   I guess I’ll keep my bun.  Now turn around and look!” Jessie said.

“This is heavenly!” Ellen exclaimed as she stroked the lace.  It’s just what I wanted.  I’ll slip into these and you can help me into it.”  With that she stepped behind the dressing screen.  Jessie handed her the corset, bra, and slip.

“Just sing out if you need help with those.”  In minutes, Ellen stepped out in her undergarments.  “I took the liberty of bringing a slip to match the other undies.”

“This lingerie is exquisite, too pretty to cover up, almost.” Ellen murmured.

“Nothing makes a woman feel prettier than frilly underthings, but I can take them back if you don’t need them.” Jessie offered.

“Don’t even think of that” laughed Ellen.  A much shapelier woman stepped from behind the screen.  “Help me into that dress.”

“Now this is more like it,”  Ellen said.  “Why didn’t you bring this yesterday?”

“I actually forgot about it.  It came in with a broken zipper and I was going to send it back, but I got Cora to put in a new zipper and put a few custom touches for you.” Jesse confided.

“Viola?  Isn’t  she the one who makes the wedding dresses? My girls will be needing dresses.  I might ask her to make them some.”  Ellen’s eyes sparkled at the thought of dressing little girls.  “And I need something for the funeral.  Maybe Viola can fix up that black satin one for me.”

Jessie didn’t like that a bit.  “She has more jobs than she can handle now.  I can dress those girls for you in a flash.  How old are they?  I’ll bring some precious things over in a day or so?”

“Charlotte is  five years old and the baby is eight months.  You can come back tomorrow, but I still might talk to Viola. I want the Evans women to be the best-dressed in town!”  She had no idea of the challenge facing her.

 

 

With Ellen’s general improvement and desire to resume her social life, Charles knew it was time to reacquaint Ellen with her two youngest children.  She had no clear memory of her hospitalization and referred simply to her female troubles.  With Cousin Jean’s death, Geneva would be back home. It was time she was relieved of the responsility of the girls.  She was past seventy.  The worries put on her with Ellen’s illness and care of the girls had gone on too long.  His family must be reunited.

Cora laid a light lunch in anticipation of Geneva’s arrival.  The mother and daughter embraced.  “Mother, it seems like forever since I saw you.  Why didn’t you come see me when I was sick?  You’ve been away so long.  I missed you.”

“I missed you, too. I came to see you every day till I had to go to Cousin Jean’s.  You were on the mend, but you just don’t remember.” Geneva explained.

“How is Cousin Jean?  I need to get out to see her.  I’ve thought of her often lately, for some reason.  She is odd, but I love her.”  Ellen told her mother.

Geneva looked to Charles for help.  “Ellen, we’ve suffered a loss.  Cousin Jean died during the night.  Geneva found her this morning.  “This has all been really hard on Geneva.  You know Cousin Jean was like a mother to her.  She’s going to need us, now.”  Charles took Geneva’s hand.

Tears sprung to Ellen’s eyes as she moved to hug her mother.  “Oh, Mother.  I am so sorry.  I know how much Cousin Jean meant to you and to all of us.  I always loved our times on her farm.”

“It’s hard to lose her.  I feel like a ship with no anchor.  I’m the last of the old ones left now.  It won’t be too long till I’ve gone to her.” Geneva mourned.

“Oh Mother, don’t say that.”

Charles spoke softly, “Ellen, I need to talk to you about your illness and some family matters.  I know you’ll have questions, and I’ve been dreading this talk, so please let me get it over with.  This will come as a shock to you, but you didn’t just have simple “female trouble.”  You surprised us all by giving birth to a baby girl several months ago.  I know you’ve heard of “baby blues. Well, after the baby came, you had a nervous breakdown.  You were a danger to yourself and everyone around you.  You were admitted to a hospital in Dallas.  It took a while but you’re getting back to your old self.  Do you remember any of this?” He asked.

“I have had a lot of terrible dreams, but it’s not like I really remember.  Did the baby die?” she asked.

“Oh no.  She’s fine.  She’s eight months old now.  Geneva has been keeping her at Cousin Jean’s.  I didn’t want to spring her on you till I felt like you were back to yourself.  When you were so confused, I didn’t think she needed to be  around you. You haven’t mentioned our other little girl, Charlotte either, Do you remember her?”

Ellen’s eyes clouded.  “Charlotte!  I do remember Charlotte!  I thought I dreamed her up.  How can a mother forget her own children?”

“You were in such a state after the baby came suddenly, it was all too much for you and your mind shut down.  You didn’t notice the boys either, when you first got home.  I thought I’d lost you. I thank God you’re better every day.” Charles spoke.  “Now you’re better, we need to bring the girls home.”

“Yes.  I want to see my girls.” Ellen whispered.

Thursday morning Jessie brought Ellen ten dresses to choose from.  Ellen hadn’t realized she was still about twenty pounds heavier than her last fitting.  She could only squeeze into two of the ten.   The group included  a black satin evening dress and a turquoise and black day dress of a mature style she abhorred.  “I see my business is no longer important to you, Jessie Austin, if this is the best you can bring me.  Besides these are fourteens and you know I wear an eight.  Now take these and come back tomorrow with some pastel shades.  My grandma wouldn’t be caught dead in these old black rags,” Ellen spouted angrily.  With this, Ellen flopped on the bed in a tantrum, sobbing loudly.

“I’ll do what I can Miss Ellen, but most of the spring pastels are gone, but I think I do have a yellow one that would make you shine.  I can bring it by after four tomorrow if that suits you.”  Miss Jessie turned and went back in the bedroom to comfort Ellen and save herself.  She wouldn’t  have had Ellen and her mother not been her best customers,.   She’d  have walked Ellen’s back door and never looked back, but each of them bought hundreds of dollars every spring and fall.  “Miss Ellen, I just remembered I had a custom order for a yellow silk, and it was delayed so the woman had to buy something else. I do believe it is just what you want.   I’ll bring it by about four tomorrow if you like.  Also, I have some new bra and corset sets.  You know you need to try the dress with the foundation garments you’ll be wearing. I can bring those and stock by Peacock’s shoe store and pick up a couple of matching pairs of shoes for you to try.  I seem to remember you wear a six, don’t you?”  Miss Jessie asked.  “Now I need to measure you to make sure of your size.  Ellen  turned her back and Jessie measured her bust and waist.  “I’ll be back tomorrow with something you’re gonna love, in exactly your size.  I won’t disappoint you again.”

Jessie hurried to her shop to get the size ten ,yellow, silk dress.   measured it and found it a full four inches too small in the bust and waist.  Fortunately, the wide butterfly sleeves would not need altercation.  She took the dress back to Viola Perkins who was doing alterations in a cluttered back room of the shop.  Jessie always acted like she didn’t see the clutter.  She couldn’t risk annoying such a valuable employee.  Viola made and sold custom wedding, bridesmaid’s, mother of the bride, and flower girl dresses through Jessie’s shop.  Patrons had to order their dresses a year ahead, she was so busy.  Jessie sold lots of lingerie and trousseau to brides, so it worked for both of them.

“Viola, I need a huge favor.  Ellen Pendergrass asked me to bring her some dresses.  She’s been in the hospital and gained a lot of weight.  I know this dress is far too little for her, but it’s the only thing I’ve got that might work.  Can you please alter it? I’ll pay you twenty five dollars to fix it. I have her bust and waist measurements right here.  And whatever you do, don’t mention her weight to anybody.  Dr. Charles will have our heads if we upset her.” Jessie handed her the dress.  “If this goes well, she’ll want several more.”

Viola sighed and put down her work. She spread the dress flat on her worktable and measured.  “I think I’ve got something that will work.”  She pulled out some pale yellow silk and a large piece of lace overlay.  With her scissors she split the dress from neckline to hem.”  Jessie gasped.  It was so quick, she couldn’t imagine  anything good could come of it.  Viola carefully placed the lace overlay over the yellow silk.  Without a hint of a pattern, she snipped away at the front and back necklines, lowering them.   She quickly put a new zipper in. She’d done alterations for Ellen many times and knew she loved showing off her swan-like neck and voluptuous bosom.  Jessie lost her nerve and left the sewing room, wondering how it would ever be a dress again.  By the time Jessie got in the next morning, the sumptuous dress  and a silk-lined lacewrap were in the window for all to see.

“Viola, I have one more thing I need you to do  Take the size ten tag off and exchange it for a size eight.”

Several women stopped in wanting to buy it, but of course, it wasn’t for sale at any price.  Jessie sent them back to see if Viola wanted to make any of them a dress of a different pattern.

Jessie skipped lunch after the morning rush and took a swatch of the silk to Peacock’s Shoe Store.  “Mr. Peacock, I need some of your best shoes to match this swatch.   I promised to bring a dress over for her this afternoon, and I’m sure she’ll want a matching bag and shoes  the outfit is for an afternoon tea.  She said she wants a size six.”  Jessie said.

“Well she must be planning to wear them for earrings, then..I always send her a seven and a half and just mark out the size.  Otherwise, I’d never get her to buy nothin’ .How do these two pair look?  He pulled out two pair of alligator shoes, one pale yellow and one bone color and two matching purses.

Those are beautiful.  Can I just take both pair of shoes and bring them back if they won’t do.” asked Jessie.

“Why sure, but I don’t anticipate getting the back.  That woman’s bought more shoes from me than Carter has little liver pills.

About nine-thirty the next morning, Ellen came down to the kitchen for breakfast.  Cora could tell she wanted to talk and dreaded what might be coming..  “Cora, I need you to call the Cut and Curl and tell Marjean to come over about two.  I need a trim and style, and a red tint.  Now I want Marjean, not just anybody, you hear.”  she was emphatic.

“Miss Ellen, I can sure call her, but she might not come on my say so.”  Cora wasn’t too happy about passing that message on to Mss Marjean.  Miss Marjean could be quite hateful, especially to black people.   She wanted them to stay in their place.  Cora knew Miss Marjean would think she was “getting out of her place, telling her what to do.  Besides, Miss Marjean was albusiness.  She definitely didn’t want to be around with when Miss Marjean was trying to pick Miss Ellen’s businesstry. “Dear Jesus!  You got to help us.  Dr. Evans has got to tell Miss Ellen about them sweet babies before somebody else does.

Instead of calling  MIss Marjean, Cora called Dr. Evans and told him about Ellen’s plan, Dr. Charles said he would take care of it.  He was headed home right now, anyway. Geneva had just called him and told him Cousin Jean had passed.  Geneva, the girls and Josie would be home in an hour or so.  He didn’t think Ellen had been close to Cousin Jean, but he wanted to tell her before Geneva got home.  Geneva was very upset.  Cousin Jean was the only mother she’d ever known.

 

 

”

 

 

Those days at Cousin Jean’s farm were golden.  The children basked in the love showered on them.  Geneva treasured her times with Cousin Jean, knowing her elderly relative’s time was running out.  Cousin Jean had a special affinity for little Charley, knowing the difficulties that lay ahead, difficulties she had faced decades earlier.  She and Geneva had many discussions of how Charley’s road could be made easier, especially in view of Ellen’s feelings toward her.  Cousin Jean resolved to leave her farm to Charley, knowing it would be a refuge and living.  Geneva felt greatly relieved, knowing the child would be well provided for.

Ellen slowly improved after her return home.  Her recent memory was cloudy due to the shock treatments.  She still spent most of her days quietly in her room, but Charles asked that she join him and the boys in the dining room every evening, hoping to ease her back into normalcy.  The boys chafed at formal dining and often wriggled out of it, but Ellen was starting to inquire about their school and sports again.  She’d not mentioned the girls, but did ask after her mother.  She was a bit miffed at learning her mother was attending Cousin Jean, but softened upon learning Cousin Jean’s health was failing.  “I suppose it’s only natural she’d want to be with her.  Cousin Jean was the closest she had to a mother.”  She sat quietly and sipped her wine.  “Charles, I am starting to feel lonely.  I am still to weak to go out, but I’d like to see my friend Sarah Marshall.  I think I’ll ask Cora set a light tea and invite her over a week from Thursday.  Do you think I’ve recovered my looks enough to see her?  I wouldn’t want word to get out that I’ve lost my looks.”

Charles was pleased to hear of her interest.  “You are still weak, but you seem stronger every day.  I love your hair in that soft curly style.  It makes you look like a girl.  I’ve noticed lots of women are starting to cut their hair.  You’ve gotten your figure back, too.  I think it would do you good to have Sarah to tea.  I could get Miss Jessie to send you some dresses over to try if you like.  If that doesn’t tire you too much, I think it would be good to have Sarah to tea one afternoon.  Let’s just see how it goes over the next few days.”

Charles made up his mind to talk to Sarah and Miss Jessie, warning them not to ask disturbing questions.  The time was approaching when they’d have to talk about the girls.  He’d not gone into her illness and she hadn’t asked specifically.  so far, she’d been satisfied when he’d alluded to female troubles and complications.

 

Rest and rehabilitation at home was restorative for the beleaguered Ellen.  For weeks, she rested taking her meals when Cora prompted.  Docile and fatigued, she only got out of bed for toileting.  Cora bathed her at bedside for fear the bath would upset her, and dressed her in the filmy dressing gowns Miss Jessie sent from her shop.  Her hair was still far too short to put up in the styles she favored, but with improved diet and care, it curled naturally in a fetching cap-like style around her face.  Her weight was steadily coming down since she had little interest in food.  Charles was relieved that she appeared not to have noticed her earlier heaviness.

He made a point to be home by six every evening to have dinner in her room with her.  They’d share a glass or two of wine afterwards as he read to her.  He felt as though his Ellen was coming back to him.  The boys, seventeen and fourteen, made polite appearances and were on their best behavior in her company, before going on their way.  Ellen made no mention of the girls.  Charles decided to leave well-enough alone and let that problem wait.

The little girls, Charley, now nearly five and Ginny eight months, thrived at the farm in the company of Grandmother Geneva, Cousin Jean, and Josie.  For her part, Geneva was glad of the chance to remain with Cousin Jean who appeared frail.  Charley spent her days playing in the barn, climbing trees, and romping with the baby goats.  She was in Heaven!

Bobby Harris, the son of Cousin Jean’s farm hand and Bessie, her help, had caught seventeen-year-old Josie’s eye.  A tall, shy brown boy, he was always dreaming up a trip to the pond for fishing or swimming, anything to get time alone with sweet Josie, though they had to take Charley along as chaperone.  Josie was a buxom girl with a glowing café-au-lait complexion.  Both were innocent in their first love.  Josie had never had the opportunity to have a beau.  Her mother kept her on a short leash, hoping to protect her from an early pregnancy, which was how Josie came in the world.

One April day, Bobby came over to let them know the dewberries were ready for picking.  Cousin Jean dug out big sun hats and overalls for protection, and borrowed a pair for Charley that Bobby’s younger brother had outgrown.  They spent a wonderful morning in the berry patch, filling buckets and buckets with precious dewberries.  Charley ate as many as she could hold, despite being told a bear or snake might have peed on them.  Sunburned and exhausted, they picnicked in the shade before returning to the house with their harvest.

That’s when the trouble started.  Geneva ran a bath for Charley, intending to bathe her and wipe her down for chiggers.  Everything was fine till Geneva tried to put a dress on her afterwards.  Charley insisted on putting the overalls back on, totally unconcerned that they were dirty and might be loaded with chiggers.  She threw such a fit, Geneva let her play in her bloomers till it was time for her nap, reasoning she’d forget the overalls.  She tossed the overalls in with the wash Bessie had in the wringer washer.  The overalls were blowing in the hot breeze when Charley went looking for them.  She pulled them off the line, dropping them in the dirt.  Bessie and Geneva found her struggling to get the dirty overalls on.  Bessie laughed and went to get her another pair of her boy’s worn overalls.  Charley was delighted.  This was the first interest Geneva had ever known her to show in clothes.

“Well, aren’t you a fine little farmer.  You can wear those overalls as long as you are here, but your mama will have a fit if she sees you in them.  Now, run play.” The women chuckled at Charley’s chubby little backside as she put on her straw farm hat and took off for the barn.  “Charley, you leave those new puppies alone.  Their mama might bite you!”

“I will, Granny.  I’m going to drive the tractor!” Charley called over her shoulder.  “Don’t get in my way.  I might run over you.”  Charley climbed on a tractor rusting in the barn lot.  It hadn’t run in years, only serving as a source for parts for the new tractor, the twenty-year-old one.  Charley enjoyed total freedom to use it for her “farming.”

“She’s just the cutest little thing, ain’t she?”  said Cousin Jean.  “Makes me think a lot of me at her age.”

“Yes, she is,” Geneva agreed. 

 

“but I’m afraid there’s gonna be a lot of trouble between her and her

mama.”

---

 

Heartsick at the change in his wife, Charles castigated himself on the long drive home.  I trusted James Jones.  His sanitarium is well-known for its amazing cures.  I should have asked more questions, observed his methods.  If God only brings my Ellen back, I’ll never do this to her again. Added to his regrets for Ellen, was the fact that he’d referred many patients to Dr. Jones over the years and never heard from them again.  Families were loath to discuss the craziness of their family members, a subject best not mentioned.  He’d even heard of one or two who had “killed themselves” and wondered about that now.

He tried initiating conversation with Ellen, only to receive one word, monosyllabic answers.  He pointed out sights on the drive home but she’d only look and look away.  He stopped for lunch at a little tea room they’d visited several times.  Ellen showed no interest, so he ordered tea and chicken salad for her, one of her favorites.  They took their tea on the terrace, as he was hoping she wouldn’t be disturbed.  Baskets of flowers hung all around.  He felt things were going well till a hummingbird whizzed by her ear.  Ellen jumped up screamed and slapped at her ears, upsetting the tea table.  She undoubtedly thought it was the buzz of the electroconvulsive charge she’d endured so many times.  He led her to the car, weeping, once her hysterics subsided, and sobs soon gave way to snoring.

Charles was glad he’d sent the Charley and Ginny with their grandmother Geneva to visit with Cousin Jean at her farm.  Cousin Jean was getting on in years and had been yearning to see the children.  Josie had gone along to help so it wouldn’t be too much for the older two ladies.  They’d packed clothes, books, and toys to last all summer should they need to extend their stay.  Charles and Geneva agreed it would be best to see how Ellen fared before bringing the little ones back home.  The boys, busy teenagers, were at home, going about their business as always, unlikely to concern Ellen much.  She’d never been too much involved in their lives, anyway.  Though Geneva was concerned about her daughter, of course, she felt the children shouldn’t be there until they were sure of her stability.

Cora was as shocked at the change in Ellen as Charles had been.  Together, she and Charles got Ellen upstairs and dressed her in a gown and wrapper not worn since her pregnancy with Charley, and helped her to bed.  Ellen looked around the familiar room and signed, “Home at last.  Thanks be to God.  I didn’t know if I’d ever get here.”  Tears came to Charles’s eyes as she nodded off.  Removing the hand mirror from her bedside table, he and Cora slid the dressing table out Ellen’s view, hoping to postpone the inevitable shock when she saw the change in herself.  Lastly, they placed a bell on her bed stand, though she remained too foggy to use it for several days.

When they were back in the kitchen, well out of her hearing, Charles took Cora in his confidence.  “Cora, I don’t want her taking phone calls or receiving guests.  She’d be ashamed for anyone to see her the way she is.  Don’t leave her alone for a minute.  Let’s keep her on broth, fruit, salads, and juices for now.  We’ve got to get some of that weight off her as quickly as we can. I’ll tell her she’s on a special diet because she’s been sick and that caused her to lose her hair. It’s dangerous that she’s gained so much in a few months.  I’ll call Miss Jessie’s shop and get her to send some bigger things over to help her get by till then.  Also, I’ll have to ask Miss Jessie about some help for her hair.  She might be able to come up with a wig, some false hair, or something.  She must know somebody.  Ellen will be horrified to see herself so changed.  Also, be careful not to bring up the children unless she asks.  I don’t know how much she remembers.  You can’t discuss this with anyone.  If I hear a whisper, I’ll know where it came from.  I will talk to the boys and ask Miss Geneva to keep the children at Cousins Jean’s a while longer.”

“Dr. Charles.  You didn’t have to remind me to keep your troubles quiet.   I ain’t gonna do anything to hurt this family.  I been working for y’all since you married.  Don’t you think I know which side my bread is buttered on?  Ol’ Cora ain’t fool enough to mess up the best job she ever had.”

“I apologize for putting it to you that way, Cora.  I guess I’m just so worried I am not thinking right.  Thanks for standing by us.  I should have said it sooner,” Charles replied.

“We all in this together,” Cora reassured him.  “We all got to look out for them babies.  They the ones.”

“That they are,” Charles agreed.  “That they are!”

 

Sadly, Ellen found herself in a situation where the goal was to keep patients quiet and out of trouble.  Ellen was awakened the morning after her first electroconvulsive treatment for an ice bath.  Like all the other patients, she was restrained before being immersed, or she would have fought her way out.  Attendants, hardened to the misery they were inflicting, periodically poured in more ice. One particularly cruel attendant pleasured himself by holding the heads of screaming patients underwater.  Ellen was held under repeatedly.

Upon removal from their bath, patients were placed in heat cabinets for malarial treatment to raise their temperature, the theory being that the shock of going from ice to heat would jolt them into sanity.  Indeed, they did respond to the comfort of the heat, until they endured it long enough to get their body temperature over one hundred degrees, when they’d become stuporous.  That certainly calmed them, which counted as a cure.

The routine Ellen came to know was barbaric, though her husband paid a princely sum for it.  One Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, she had electroconvulsive treatment in the mornings.  Tuesdays and Thursdays she was subjected to ice baths and malarial treatment.

Three afternoons a week, Ellen along with the other unfortunate patients were scheduled for insulin shock therapy.  There was no differentiation among diagnoses.  Manic-depressives, as patients with bipolar disease were known then, schizophrenics, and depressives were all scheduled.  Unruly women or inconvenient wives were often committed should their menfolk have influential friends.

Ellen was routinely strapped to a stretcher and administered between one hundred and one hundred fifty units of insulin, shock being the goal. Soon, she be convulsing.  Revived with either intravenous or oral dextrose, she would be returned to the ward, dazed and confused.  The cruelest aspect was the wait in line watching other patient’s therapy in progress.  Weight gain was an unfortunate result.  In three months, Ellen gained sixty pounds, a fact that would devastate her.

Under the care of this system, Ellen went from being functional prior to the birth of her last baby, to postpartum psychosis, a condition that might have resolved with time and a return to normal hormones, to battered, dazed, and confused.

Having trusted her to the care of his colleague, Charles had not been allowed to visit.  When she’d been in care for four months, her doctor called with news that she was much calmer and ready for release.  Dr. Jones explained, “You’ll find your wife much calmer, but somewhat changed.  She may need some help at home for a while, but she will get back to herself in a few months, don’t you worry.  She shouldn’t have any more babies, so you might consider a hysterectomy for her, or there could be a recurrence of her illness.  She should do well once she’s back home.  Good luck to you.”

When Charles anxiously arrived for his wife, he didn’t recognize the portly woman in a shapeless, institutional gown awaiting him in the solarium of the facility.  Her short, straight hair fanned out in an arc as she sat humming and staring off in the distance.  He thought he’d been shown to the wrong patient, but was assured by the attendant, “This is Mrs. Evans.  She’s just put on a little weight and we had to cut her hair.”

Charles was devastated.  He loved his wife dearly and had delivered her into care, thinking their lives would resume when she was pronounced “cured.”  This woman bore little resemblance to the spirited beauty who’d always charmed him, despite her demands.  In truth, her spirit was what won him to her.  He felt like “his Ellen” had died.

He went to her. “Oh Ellen, I’ve missed you.”  He embraced her, but didn’t kiss her.  “Are you ready to go home?”

She looked blank for a bit, as though searching for an answer. “Home? Yes,take me home.”

 

Being an overindulged darling daughter had done nothing to prepare Ellen for dealing with life. Her life had always revolved around what she wanted and felt she deserved.  Her postpartum psychosis left her with no understanding of the irrational thoughts plaguing her. Having no control over her life disarmed her further.  Her outbursts and combativeness jeopardized her further.

One Tuesday morning after a particularly difficult night, Ellen was restrained and strapped to a stretcher.   Attendants rolled her into a treatment room where zombie-like women filed in and took seats on straight chairs before a screened area.  Some of the women were crying.  One twisted a handkerchief and others bit their nails.  Eventually, two were called behind the curtain.  The first broke into tears but the other just shuffled her way on.  Twenty minutes or so later, one was rolled out and Ellen was brought behind the screen.  The crying woman was assisted to a stretcher where she submitted to restraints, despite her pleas “Not today. Not today.  I’ll be good!”  An attendant continued without reassurance, fitting electrodes to her head and putting a shoe heel in her mouth.  In seconds, the woman convulsed, relaxed and convulsed again.  Ellen could smell feces and urine.  When the treatment was over, the woman was lifted by the attendants to a wheelchair, where she slumped as she was rolled out in her soiled clothes.

As quickly as possible, Ellen’s stretcher was rolled into position.  The attendants chatted amiably with each other about the upcoming weekend, not even speaking to Ellen about what was going on.  One checked her restraints while the other fitted electrodes to her head.  Ellen thrashed and screamed as they got her ready for her turn.  Unable to work loose, Ellen tried to bite one of the women and was slapped for her efforts.

“Bitch!  You tried to bite me!  I’ll teach you!  She slapped Ellen twice more and spoke to the other attendant.  “I am so sick of putting up with the rich bitches they keep draggin’ in here for us to tend to.  Ain’t none of ’em ever done nothin’ for nobody but themselves.  I’m gettin’ on in the laundry soon’s I can.  Least I won’t have to mess with trash like this.”

“I know,” the other woman answered.  “I’m gettin’ so I’d just soon knock ’em in the head as look at ’em.  I bet this one ain’t never done a day’s work in her life.  This ought to settle her right down.”  With that, she flipped a switch and Ellen convulsed.  After a moment’s wait, she turned the charge again, resulting in another convulsion and relaxation of her bowel and bladder sphincters.  Blood poured from Ellen’s mouth from where she’d bitten her tongue.  “Oh Lord, I forgot to put the block in her mouth and she bit her tongue.  We better keep an eye on her till it stops bleeding.  We don’t want to get put on report.”  With that, she put a rolled bandage in Ellen’s mouth and rolled her stretcher to the side.  “I sure hope this don’t get us in trouble.”  Ellen’s lay in her own soil as her head lolled to one side and the dressing soaked up blood.

 

 

 

 

 

When Ellen continued to scream obscenities and threats despite her restraints, Matron came with attendants who held her while Matron injected her into silence.  Ellen had no way of knowing, but it was more than thirty-six hours before she woke on a locked ward with numerous other patients.  She was vaguely aware of a giggling presence patting her face.  She slapped, eliciting a high-pitched squeal.

“Awake and making trouble already, are you?  This will calm you down.” A bitter elixir was forced into her mouth.  When she spewed it out, a resounding slap rung her left ear. “You’ll do as you’re told here, Miss, or pay the price.”  She couldn’t see through her fog, but another injection soon stung.

When she finally aroused, she was a different woman, listless, out of touch with any world she knew.  The former Ellen would have railed at the locked ward, the pitiful humanity she shared it with.  A naked woman smeared feces on a wall; another rocked a rag baby, crooning to it.  Another repeatedly walked into a wall, calling, “Alice? Alice? Alice?”

Though Ellen had always been a haughty, superior sort who’d snubbed many, it’s unlikely any would have wished this Hell on her.  Dr. Evans had called his colleague several times to check on her and been told, “She’s calm and progressing well, but expect a lengthy stay.”

Things were settling back to a new normal at home.  Charles had brought Charley home to be reunited with Cora, Josie was enlisted to live in and care for Ginny, and he’d been able to get back to work.  The boys were old enough to be occupied with school, sports, and their friends, so their lives were not disturbed.  Charley and Ginny thrived in the loving environment.  Charles missed Ellen, but hoped she wouldn’t disturbed the peace on her eventual return home.