Everywhere you go now, you see people with little bags following their pets around, intent on capturing their precious leavings, an admirable trait in a society that values clean shoes and carpets, but if this had been going on for all time, can you imagine how it would have changed the course of history? Adam and Eve might never have gotten a bite of that apple if they’d been watching for their serpent to “go” instead of listening to him natter on. And it wouldn’t have been just the serpent.  If you recall the story, they were the only two people in the Garden with a host of animals.  If they’d been responsible for cleaning up after all of them, they wouldn’t have had time to get in trouble.  The Mongols wouldn’t have been much of a threat had they taken time to clean up behind their horses.  Hannibal would have been hauling mountains of elephant dung before he ever got around to crossing the Alps!

On a more mundane level, of course, dog-walking etiquette requires that the dog’s assistant carry handy little clean up bags.  Should the potential poop scooper be reluctant or slow to scurry behind Bowzer to collect his offerings, property owners and fellow walkers glare their intent to protest.  Any day, I expect to see sad dogs out walking with their catheters and urine collection devices gazing mournfully at fireplugs.