This post has nothing to do with Vagina, Boobs, and Poop.  I am doing a post on crazy things my mother has said and done and wanted to see if this garnered interest.  Mother is sensitive about her age and height, so I can’t mention the fact that she is past eighty, and “not tall,” but besides that, has said and done some interesting things.   (Links to part 1-5 below)

http://atomic-temporary-73629786.wpcomstaging.com/2015/01/01/vagina-boobs-and-poop-2/

http://atomic-temporary-73629786.wpcomstaging.com/2015/01/01/vagina-boobs-and-poop-2/

http://atomic-temporary-73629786.wpcomstaging.com/2015/01/03/vagina-boobs-and-poop-part-3/

http://atomic-temporary-73629786.wpcomstaging.com/2015/01/04/vagina-boobs-and-poop-part-4/

htthttp://atomic-temporary-73629786.wpcomstaging.com/2015/01/05/vagina-boobs-and poop-part-5/

Just Jot It January – Pingback Post and Rules

Sorry, Your Highness, My Mother’s a Snob

1.  She left her lights on, ran her car battery down, and asked a nice young police officer to “jack her off.”  She wasn’t arrested.

3.  She once crashed  wedding in cut off blue jeans, sitting in the first row on the bride’s side.  The family was not friendly.

4.  She was once locked in a museum and had to be rescued by the fire department, climbing over the fence on their ladder.

5.  She was locked in Windsor Castle. More on that later.

6. She rolled up a car window up on a camel’s lip.  These things happen.

7.  She made change in the offering plate at church and came out twenty dollars ahead.

8.  She lost her bra at church one Sunday.  She never could explain that!

9,  When two intruders broke in her house, she made one of them help her into her robe before she would talk to them.  She gave them eleven dollars, telling them, “That’s enough!” They thanked her when they left, telling her to “have a nice day.”  She told the police officers later, “They were polite and had been raised right.”  Go figure.

10.  She threatened a rapist

11. She won’t say “Bull.”  That sounds crude.  She substitutes “male cow.”

Don’t tell her I said vagina, boobs, and poop. God knows she tried to raise me right!

 

#6  She raised a car window on a camel’s lip.  These things happen.

We went to visit an exotic animal park several years ago.  Unfortunately, it was a low budget operation that encouraged visitors to purchase packets of munchies that enticed the hungry critters to follow vehicles around hoping for a handout. (I suspect that may have been a major portion of their diet.  (They accepted gifts of dead large animals, providing  pick up if you called before the beast got cold.)

Mother was delighted by the apparent “friendliness” of one particularly aggressive large camel who had taken a liking to her. He trotted along beside her as she tossed out the feeding pellets.  After she ran out of pellets, he continued running along side the automobile trying to put his head in the window to nudge for more.  Becoming concerned about the invasion, she pressed the button to raise the window.  As the driver sped up, the camel trotted faster.  Mother was impressed remarking, “Look at that stupid camel.  He’s determined to keep up with this car!”  The race continued along with Mother’s amusement.  “He’s still coming.  Just look how fast he’s moving!”

Indeed he was!  Mother had trapped his upper lip in the closed car window!  My brother-in-law stopped so she could lower her window, freeing her new friend.  The camel dropped her from his social circle and loped off in the opposite direction, taking care not to stumble over his drooping upper lip.

http://atomic-temporary-73629786.wpcomstaging.com/2015/01/02/meet-kathleen-alias-my-mother-on-video/   link to YouTube link