Annie Sleeps Around

dalmation 2More on Annie, our foul-tempered, farting, fat, Dalmatian who only liked the neighbor kid across the street.

One of Annie’s loveliest traits was that it was impossible to keep her off the furniture. When we told the kids to go to bed, she was the first to hit the bed. Anyone careless enough to leave a bedroom door open could count on a bed partner as soon as they drifted off. A couple of houseguests were awakened by the crushing weight of a heavy, nasty, growling surprise when they didn’t shut their door securely. No featherweight, she’d heft herself on atop an unfortunate sleeper with no concern whatsoever for whomever might be occupying that bed. It was common to hear one of us yell out “Get out, Annie!” followed by a nasty tempered, low growl, then the padding of feet down the hall.

From another room, a from a muffled voice would let out a big “Oof! Annie! Get over!” There’d be some shuffling from that bed till she crowded that victim enough to get moved along.

Annie had no intention of going outdoors when we left. When she heard us making preparations to leave, she’d sneak stealthily back to the kid’s room. We turned to tables on her own day, announcing we were on our way out, making a great show of leaving, then awaiting her by the door. As soon as the door shut, she came prancing in the living room, prepared to jump on the sofa. She was mortified when she spotted us, dropped her head, and walked to the front door to be put out. It was good to get the best of her for once.

46 thoughts on “Annie Sleeps Around”

    • I had 41 on my father’s side. Many of them acted feral. Some I liked. I had 1 on my mother’s side. She was ofd but pretty ok. Sadly I had to go no contact with her because she constantly begged for money. I had to threaten to contact her with adult protection because every couple of months she’d as Mother for $300. Sometimes it was for tires, sometimes storage building rent. One time she wanted money for cat food. She was a cat hoarder and didn’t know how many cats she fed. It was never-ending harassment. Some months she’d contact Mother , me, and all my siblings with same request.

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    • I did that time. Annie was a horrible dog. I felt morally bound to provide her a lifelong home but she was awful. When she got old and sick I kept hoping the vet would say it was “time.” She lived thirteen long years.

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  9. inkysquidge's avatar Aileen says:

    It sounds like Annie is boss! Dogs never fail to amuse me. I have 4 dogs, all different in breed and personality. They’re extremely naughty and think they own the place – and still I smile.

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  16. This is great! We have an :Annie” in our household who pulls the exact same stunts. Thanks for making it funny instead of maddening. I’ll try your solution, it would be priceless to catch him in the act, for once!

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