
TOP 10 USES FOR HOLIDAY FRUITCAKES
10. Use slices to balance that wobbly kitchen table.
9. Use instead of sand bags during El Nino.
8. Send to U.S. Air Force, let troops drop them.
7. Use as railroad ties.
6. Use as speed bumps to foil the neighborhood drag racers.
5. Collect ten and use them as bowling pins.
4. Use instead of cement shoes.
3. Save for next summer’s garage sale.
2. Use slices in next skeet-shooting competition.
1. Two words pin cushion.
I kind of love fruitcake. Our local grocery store makes an all-butter fruitcake that’s delicious, and I used to make fruitcake cookies. Long live the fruitcake! (Myself included.)
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I like it if it doesn’t have candied fruit.
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Hell yeah
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