Joe met Francie working in kitchen at Oklahoma State Correctional Center. She was in for breaking and entering. He’d been busted for car theft. Thy found they had a lot in common. Frankie moved in with her sister Sue when she got out. Joe followed her to Sue’s when he got out. Joe came up with twenty bucks. Sue was broke but needed cigarettes. They agreed to buy her a pack if she’d give them a ride to the store. She waited in the car while they went in. Remembering something she needed, she decided to go in. Once inside, she saw Joe and Frankie stealing Finish the story in the comments.
Storytelling
Lou and Lynn Part 16 Uncle tAlbert’s Riverfront Cabin: A dangerous Family Adventure
Uncle Albert was building his house atop a hill over the river. Actually, he was taking apart his old log cabin and moving it near the river where he was reassembling it log by log with the help of his many nephews. Before he could get to that, he had to have a water well. Even though most people would have hired a business to drill one. Uncle Albert wouldn’t be doing that. He had no money. His nephews agreed to pitch in and dig one for him knowing they’d have to dig at least twenty feet to reach water.
The work had already started when Mr. Al came bumping up. Numerous cousins came running up to the truck calling “Lynn!” Or “Billy!” The children jumped out of the truck, ready to play with their cousins.
”Be careful!” called Aunt Kat, her warning falling on their disappearing backs. She went to join the women at a makeshift picnic area. Mr. Al joined the diggers at the well site.
One of the children had brought his red wagon. “Hey! Let’s take this wagon to the top of that hill and coast down!.” Several children climbed the gravel road up the steep hill, prepared to do that. Once they got there and looked down, Allen, the wagon’s owner reconsidered. The river’s high banks stretched near the bottom of the ride. “I changed my mind. Somebody else go first.”
”We’ll go.” called Lynn, glad for the first turn. She and Lou climbed in Allen gave the wagon a shove. They fairly flew down the hill, Lynn guiding the rattling wagon through the gravel. Dust fogged up behind them. The clattering of the descending wagon and cheers of the children caught the attention of their elders, who were horrified at the sight of the wagon flying down the hill toward the river below!
They dropped their work, shouting “Stop! Stop! The wagoneers could do nothing but hang on and pray for their lives. It turns out, Lynn and Lou got not only the first ride but the only ride. Lynn narrowly avoided crashing them off the high bluff into the river below.
The girls were rewarded with an angry lecture on how they’d nearly killed themselves. The wagon was confiscated!
To be continued:
Finish the story #1
Two brothers were walking to school. As they passed the gas station, a tall redheaded girl in a green hoody waved at Jerry, the older of the two. He told Lane, “Uh oh, I forgot my English homework. I have to run home and get it. You go on.”
Finish the story in the comments.
Lynn and Lou Part 15 Gathering Eggs: A Chicken Farm Tale
”Hurry and get dressed! We’re going to Uncle Albert’s today. The men are going to pitch in and dig him a well. Lynn, you and Lou go let the chickens out of the henhouse and feed them. Take this bucket and gather the eggs on your way back in. Billy put out water for the dogs and the chickens. Do NOT get wet. Come straight back in.”
The kids took off. Lynn opened the henhouse door and the chickens swarmed out. A fat hen jumped on top of Lou’s head. It was terrifying. She screamed and ran all over the chicken yard. The hen got tired of the wild ride and jumped off. Lynn laughed till tears ran down her cheeks. “I’m sorry. I forgot to tell you they do that sometimes. We raised all our chickens from babies, so they still think they’re tiny chicks.”
Yeah, sure, I’ll bet you forgot.” Lou replied. She wasn’t much upset. It probably did look funny.
“If you’re still scared, I’ll feed the chickens. They flock all around trying to get to the feed. One of them might jump on you. They won’t hurt you.” Lynn said.
”That’s okay. I was just surprised. I’ll feed them.” She scattered chicken feed all inside the chicken yard. They quickly lost interest in her. “This is actually kind of fun.”
Lynn took the egg basket over to the row of nesting boxes. They were about head high. Rather than take the time to climb the ladder, Lynn stood on tiptoe, pulling one egg from each nest. When she reached in the last nest, she screamed and took off at a run, slinging eggs along the way. “Snake! Snake! Mother! There’s a snake in the nest!” she screamed. “I hate snakes!”
Aunt Kat came at a run. She grabbed a hoe next to the chicken yard gate. She climbed a couple of steps up the ladder and raked the snake out on the ground where she chopped his head off with the hoe. The dogs were going crazy with joy. One grabbed the head, another the body. Feeling cheated, the others took off after the two lucky ones, trying to snatch their prize. Aunt Kat laughed and put her hands on her hips, “Well, I bet I won’t have to remind anybody not to reach in the nest without looking, will I? She gathered up the few unbroken eggs. “Girls, take the hoe and scratch some dirt over these broken eggs. We don’t want the dogs to start sucking eggs. Hurry, Daddy’s almost ready to go.”
The kids were in awe of what she’d done.”Your mother is the bravest woman I’ve ever seen!” said Lou: “I’m so glad I didn’t gather eggs.”
When they got back in, Mr. Al was loading the old truck with shovels and rope. Aunt Kat and the girls brought out a big basket with picnic lunch. “Get in the back and sit down. Don’t you climb up on the rails. If I have to stop and straighten you out, it won’t be good!”
”Yes Sir” they all answered. No one could have convinced her to move. She’d never seen anyone ride in the back of a truck.
Aunt Kat came around to the back of the truck and handed Lynn a brown paper bag of hot sausage biscuits with jam. “You each have two apiece, but don’t waste them. You might want one for a snack later” she said. She got in the cab of the truck. She put Connie in the car seat and clung to the little baby as the truck bumped off down the gravel road. Dust fogged up behind the truck.
Lou dug in. The biscuit sandwiches were so good, she gobbled both. What a wonderful way to start the morning.
Lou and Lynn Part 15 The Pea-Shelling Party: A Tale of Community and Fun
Mr. Al had to work the three to eleven shift that afternoon. Just before he was to leave for work, a peddler came by selling peas. Mr. Al came in carrying a huge load of peas. Aunt Kat looked appalled. “Oh no! I was planning to do laundry and mop this afternoon. Now we have to shell peas!” She spread a clean sheet on the floor and Mr. Al poured out the peas. A heap about two feet high covered three-quarters of the sheet.
“I know said Mr. Al “but we have to get peas when they’re available. These should get us through the winter.”
“I know, “ said Aunt Kat, “but it will be a big job for me and the kids to get these done by ourselves. They’ll go bad if I don’t get them in the freezer tonight.“
“I’ve gotta go. I gotta pick up Arnie for work. I’ll see if Betsy and her girl can come help.”
“That would really help.” She cheered up, knowing they would probably come help. They often helped each other on big jobs.
Soon enough, Miss Betsy and Sharon peeked in the front door. “Yoo hoo! Your help’s here.” called out Miss Betsy.
“Oh, thank you! I couldn’t imagine how I’d get all these done. Girls, get everybody a pan and let’s get started.” Lou had never seen peas shelled but she caught on quickly. The bad thing was, the purple of the pea shells stained her hands and under her fingernails. Aunt Kat told her it would wear off in a day or two.
Miss Betsy was a lot of fun. She had them laughing hysterically over her stories. Even the big baby liked her. The best thing was, Sharon loved babies. She held the little baby all the time except when the she napped. She teased Connie and kept her giggling.
Aunt Kat introduced a game called gossip they could play as the pile of peas decreased. The leader whispered a few words into the ear of the person next to them. The words couldn’t be repeated once spoken. The whispered message obviously got mangled as it passed from person to person. The last person in line revealed the message. It was hilarious. The original message “My kitten has blue eyes,” turned into “My wigwam has fried pies” They played till everyone got a chance to whisper the starting message.
After that, they all sang songs. It was like a party. Even seven-year-old Billy took his turn leading them in song. They played I Spy. They were making tremendous progress on the pile of peas when Aunt Kat took a break to make peanut butter sandwiches and kool aid for the pea shellers. By the time they were through with the peas, it was getting dusky dark. “We’d better head home before it gets too dark,” Miss Betsy said.”We have flashlights” We heard them singing far down the road.
We’d shelled two big dishpans of peas. They’d be eating peas long after I was back home. That almost felt a little sad.
Unlike washing dishes, the pea-shelling party was fun. I wished it could have gone on longer.
I was exhausted when I went to bed, too tired to talk. Loua woke me upu still had the big light on when I went to sleep. She was awakened by Grandma humming, “You are My Sunshine.”
“Grandma, I knew you’d get me home! I woke up in my own bed this morning.” said Lou, excitedly.
“Quiet!” said Grandma. “They can’t hear me but they can sure hear you. I almost messed up this morning l. It’s a wonder I didn’t spaghettify you. I can’t take that chance agin. I tried to get the bike and tore it in half. You’ll see in the morning. I’m not going to try again till I’m sure. You’re going to be here a little longer.”
“Where are you? Lou asked.
“ I think between yesterday and tomorrow. I like it. The strange thing is, a person can be in more than one place at a time. You are still at home with your parents and you are here. I’m trying to get all of you safely together at home. I’m at home and here in between.” said Grandma.
“So that’s why Mom’s not worried. I’m home, too.”
“Yes, it is but I will get you home. Don’t get discouraged.” Grandma said.
“I’ll try.” said Lou. I’m actually having a lot of fun. I like Lynn. She seems kind of familiar.”
Grandma seemed a little somber.”I won’t be back for a while. I’m getting some help from some really smart guys. We will get you home!”
The next thing she knew, Aunt Kat was waking her up.
To be continued:
Finish the Story
Doris and Fred had been married forty-two years. Three of their four children had left the nest but thirty nine-year-old Jamie kept showing back up, often with a woman in tow. Doris was thoroughly sick of him but Fred kept the door open.
He and his current love interest had been lying about for nearly two months when Fred suddenly died. Doris,,,,,,,,,finish the story.
Either copy and paste into a new post or finish in comments
Lou and Lyn Part 13 Kids’ Adventures: Tree Climbing and Chores
The sheriff left. Lynn’s dad turned to Lou. “Looks like you’re gonna be here for a while so we better get some things straight. You can call me Mr. Al. I don’t know what you’re up to but you’ve dragged me and my family into it. There’s gonna be no more lyin’ and no more nonsense about Houston an’ you bein’ born in 2015. I don’t want anymore nonsense out of you. As long as you stay here, you’re gonna follow my rules and pull your weight just the same as my kids. When you speak to an adult, you’re gonna say ma’am and sir. You will do as you are told. Do you understand?”
Lou wilted under his glare, “Uh huh.”
“You mean Yes Sir, don’t you?” he corrected her.
“Yes Sir.” she answered.
“That’s better. Now you girls get that kitchen cleaned up. Billy let’s go check on the goats.”
“Yes Sir, “ said Billy, scampering after his daddy. He was clearly looking forward to the adventure.
The girls busied themselves clearing the breakfast table. The dishes from last night’s dinner awaited them in the sink. Lynn ran scalding water over the glasses and silverware. “Ooh! What a gross mess! I hate doing old dirty dishes! These are going to have to soak while we clean up this other mess Yuck!”
Lou agreed. It looked like a hopeless task. This was only her second time to do dishes and already she hated it.
Aunt Kat came through putting a load of diapers in the washer. “After you get the dishes done, these diapers need to go on the line. Then you girls can go play awhile.” She made it sound like all that would only take a minute.
”Huh!” Said Lynn. By then it will be time to do the supper dishes.”
”Now, it’s not that bad. Lou is helping you. That should cut your work in half!” she said cheerfully. “I know you want to go play but I can’t do everything.”
”I know, Mother. You tell me that everyday.” she said.
”Don’t you get smart, young lady. The sooner you get started the sooner you’ll be done.” Aunt Kat said.
”Yes, Ma’am.” Lynn answered.
It took them over an hour to clean up the kitchen. Hanging up the diapers was actually a pleasant task. Lynn showed Lou how to pop them and hang them straight on the line. When the last was pinned up, Lynn said, “Let’s get out of here before Mother thinks of anything else. Let’s go see the goats.”
The friends ran barefoot toward the barn and scampered up the fence. Two nanny goats, each with a kid, bleated up at them. A big billy goat stared up at them, shaking his head threateningly. “Ooh!” he looks mean, said Lynn. Look at his eyes. They look like devil eyes. His pupils go straight up and down, not round like people.”
”Oh, wow! They are weird! Those babies are so cute! Can we pet them?” Asked Lou.
”We’ll have to ask Daddy.” Lynn told her.
”That’s okay.” said Lou. She was in no hurry to talk to Mr. Al
”Do you want to ride a pine tree?” asked Lynn. She ran to a stand of trees across the field. “Watch this!” She skittered up a skinny pine. As she got about three-quarters of the way up, the top started to bend over. She swung back and forth several times till it got close enough to drop to the ground. The tree sprang right back up. “Wow that was great! Do you want to try? You get a tree about this tall and this big around. She pointed out just the right tree. You climb up till it starts to bend, then you start swinging back and forth. When it goes low enough, you drop off. If the tree is too little, it will break off. If it’s too big, it’ll sling you a mile. Try this one.”
“Is it safe?” Lou asked.
“I guess so.” Lynn laughed. “I never got killed yet.”
Lou shinnied up the tree. It was harder than it looked. When she got up pretty high, it started to limber up. “Now, start swinging!” Lou shouted. “When you start getting close to the ground, drop off! I’ll tell you when.”
Lou hung on and flung herself to the left. The tree swayed. When it corrected, she swung to the right. Soon she was swinging broadly from side to side, finally nearing the ground. “Drop off! Drop off!” Shouted Lynn. Lou turned loose and fell a few feet to the ground. It was the most exciting ride she’d ever had, like flying! She couldn’t stopped laughing.
”That was cool! It felt like I was flying. I want to do it again!” She ran to another tree, quickly climbing till it swayed. The girls rode the trees all morning until they heard the car horn honking.
“Uh oh. Mother wants us. We gotta run.” She raced toward the house. Though Lou was exhausted, she tried to keep up.
To be continued:
Lou and Lynn Part 12 Escalating Tensions: Family Vs. Sheriff in a Small Town
As soon they finished breakfast, the menfolks headed outdoors. The dogs kicked up a ruckus. The sheriff was back.
Al invited him in. Everyone gathered in the living room, anxious to hear what he had to say. He addressed the adults. “None of this gal’s story checks out.” He said “gal” like it was something nasty on his shoe. “ I need to ask her a few questions. I called the Houston Police Department to ask about a missing kid and old lady. There ain’t no record of Eloise Daly or her grandmother reported missing. Besides that, there is no 3412 Crawford Road in Houston. Crawford Road numbers stop at 242. After that it runs out to the country. There’s nothin’ but cows out there. That phone number you gave me ain’t no good. How come I can’t find out about nothin’ you told me?”
Lynn’s daddy looked hard at her. The sheriff shifted in his chair, looking at her hard. “Now I’m gonna ask again an’ I don’t want anymore of your lyin’. “What’s your name and birthdate?”
Lou was scared now. “My name is Eloise Daly. I was born July 2, 2015. I just had my ninth birthday a couple of weeks ago. I live at 3412 Crawford Road, Houston, Texas, just like I told you.” She waited.
The sheriff’s face flushed. He stood up. I guess you think you real smart don’t you? You know as well as I do it’s 1964, You know what I think? I think your grandma put you out here so you could you could open the door for her. Y’all are plannin’ on robbin’ folks. There’s been some break ins last week. Don’t be lying no more about Houston or being born in 2015. You might be crazy, but I ain’t. I’m takin’ you in till your grandma shows up: Then I’ll deal with her. Come on.”
“Now hold on a minute.” said Lynn’s daddy. “This kid may be telling crazy stories but you can’t take a kid to jail for that. She ain’t hurt nothing. She ain’t no bigger than my girl. You can’t put a kid in jail.” he said.
“You’re steppin’ over the line here,” said the sheriff. Do you really want to get arrested over this lyin’ kid?”
Aunt Kat interrupted. “He’s right, Al. You don’t want to go to jail over this. Lou, come with me. We’ll get your stuff.” Lou looked like she’d been slapped but she followed Aunt Kat, to the back of the house still holding the baby.
Aunt Kat got two belts from her husband’s closet. She looped them together and fastened one around herself and the infant, and the other around Lou. They could only move together. She stuffed a few diapers in the diaper bag. “Now don’t you say a word. You’re not going anywhere. Come on.” They walked in lockstep back to the living room.
“Sheriff, you know me. I’m a decent woman and a church member. I can’t let you take this child off by herself. It’s not right. Me and the baby have to go with her. I’m the only one that can feed the baby. You can lock us all up together. She doesn’t cry too much. Al, you and Lynn can manage somehow with Connie. She’s on the bottle.” Al panicked. He’d never been responsible for the house or baby.
“No! Sheriff. You can’t take my wife and baby. She’s never done a wrong thing in her life. Kathy, you can’t go off! You’ve got a family to take care of.” Al was determined not to let her go. Little Connie clung to her mother’s leg screaming. Right on cue, she soiled her diaper.
“Al, I’m not letting a nine-year-old girl go off alone with the sheriff. You’ll just have to manage.” She responded. Al thought she’d lost her mind.
“Sheriff, This family can’t manage without her. If you’ll leave the girl here I’ll take responsibility for her. If her grandma shows up, I’ll get you word. You know I am a man of my word. I’ve never been in any trouble.” Al held out his hand.
The sheriff actually looked relieved. He’d opened a can of worms. He held out his hand to shake. “I expect to hear from you if her grandma shows up.
To be continued:
ER DIAGNOSES
In my many years working as an acute dialysis nurse, on the evenings I was on call, the last thing I did before packing it in for the day was look to see if any of my patients who were frequently admitted were were being seen in the Emergency Room. If they were, I checked their diagnosis to see if I was likely to be called back to do an emergency treatment. I’d much rather tend to problems sooner than layer. I never learned to enjoy being awakened at two am for care I could have completed before midnight.
The first employee a patient saw upon entering the ER was usually a clerk with no medical training. They asked the patient what the problem was and typed it directly in. Should the patient be in distress, a nurse was summoned immediately. Some diagnoses in the computer raised more questions than they answered.
- Zipped britches on weiner(hurts to think about that)
- Spinning and vomiting.(that one sounds like a real mess)
3. Fried worms in ear(Grandma used folk cure)
4. Lightbulb, sausage,flashlight up rectum(not uncommon)
5. Paper cut(wanted work excuse)
6. Request viagra prescription
7. Baby threw up once after eating squash(fine now. Eating chips)
8. Found 2 ticks on pants(hadn’t attached, mom wanted child checked)
9. Nausea(patient had vomiting phobia)
10. Mosquito bite(no rash, allergic reaction)
Thankfully ERs are there for people who need them but everything is not an emergency!
Nutsrok 